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"Bunnies. Bunnies. It must be bunnies! Or maybe midgets..."

"What's a knockout like you doing in a computer-generated gin-joint like this?"

the legacy of my childhood can be swiftly summed up in two products most americans have probably never heard of- hydrox cookies and horlicks malt drink.

the original, though lesser known precursor to the well known oreo - hydrox cookies back in the day were made with 100% vegetable shortening and preferred by my vigilant anti-animal lard label reading mother. and perhaps the fact that they really did have a slightly tangier filling and crunchier crunch sold us kids on them-- initially.  sold may not be the right world- more like fooled. all the cool kids were eating oreos.

ours was not a household where creamy smooth chocolate milky drinks peddled by adorable bunnies with giant ears were consumed. we did not drink nestle quick. instead, my old world mother believed that horlicks, that old malted relic from the glory days of the colonial empire was a far more healthy and sound energy drink alternative. unlike the hydrox however, it was a harder sell. it may have been the fact that no matter how vigorously you mixed or shook or blended, horlicks could never rid itself of the little crunchy bits of floating malt. and compared to what that fun rabbit had on order, we just felt pretty....uncool.